I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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