ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
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