Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
