ya dads aren't the best wingmen
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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