Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
The dick lei will go down in squad history
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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