he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize