Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
