Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
