Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
