can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
My pussy is not your playground.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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