I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
