ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Randomize
