Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Randomize
