your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
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