She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
