i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
