I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Randomize