he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
