Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
as a side note pls kill me
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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