Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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