Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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