OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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