so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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