Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize