proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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