he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
