dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize