I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Randomize
