Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
