oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
