brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
