i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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