Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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