Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
