why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
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