its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Randomize