haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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