He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
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