Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
