I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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