Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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