He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
