Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
It's blow job season.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
