I don't think brook has ever known best
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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