Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
