I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
