TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
