i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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