Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
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