i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Randomize